Pat Calabria
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November 28 - My Christmas List

What I would like for Christmas:

For every other NFL team to turn up its nose at the thought of signing Terrell Owens, leaving him to
flee to the CFL where he will play in relative anonymity, and for the weakened Canadian dollar.

For T.O.'s agent, Drew Rosenhaus, to lose the last shred of credibility he had and be reduced to
representing professional bowlers.

For the NHL to revise the shootout rule. Why, the Rangers and the Capitals went 15 shootout
"rounds" before the game was decided. This is like picking a winner of a tennis match based on
volleys standing five feet apart. What's wrong with a well-earned 3-3 tie after a five-minute overtime
anyway?

For the NHL to revise its formula for division standings. Losing, whether it's in overtime or regulation,
shouldn't get you a point. It doesn't in the NFL. It doesn't in the NBA. It doesn't in soccer.

For all those Bunyonesque sluggers using steroids to stand up and say, "Hey, I was cheating. Please
don't vote for me for the Hall of Fame."

For Pete Rose to finally say, "Hey, I was gambling. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please vote for me for
the Hall of Fame." And then, we will.

For this NASCAR thing to go away.

For professional wrestling to go away.

For Latrell Sprewell to go away.

For Stephon Marbury to listen to Larry Brown.

For my kids to listen to me.

For more Derek Jeters. And fewer Barry Bonds.

For the city of New Orleans to make a comeback. For the Saints to make a comeback. And for the
Saints' miserly owner to grow a heart.

For the Cubs to win a World Series (now that the Red Sox and White Sox have ended their oh-fers).

For a little more of Annika Sorenstam. And a little less of Danica Patrick.

For fewer stories like the Minnesota Vikings sex cruise, and NFL cheerleaders cruising for sex.

For the illegalization of boxing. It's time.

For a moratorium on the broadcasting phrase, "It's too bad one of these teams had to lose."

For ticket prices that do not cost more than my first automobile.

For automobiles that don't cost more than my first house.

For my son to actually meet his hero, Johnny Damon.

For my wife, the Yankee fan, to make peace with my son.

For peace on earth, and not just in my household.